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Thursday, December 11, 2008 The Bitchamania 2008 Card Pre-Show SMF Championship SMF Action Star Championship SMF Hardcore Championship Grudge Match BA&T Championship Survivor Series Style Elimination Match SMF Tag Team Championship SMF Original Championship SMF TV Championship Inductee of 2008 SMF Hall of Fame ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ We may see some hardcore madness and more, Bitchamania 2008 will take place from Washington, D.C. on December 21, 2008. JJ, Bob Ross, Bill Cosby, Jeff, and Gre will all be in the house. Monday, September 22, 2008 The biggest shocker in CAW history happened when Barack Obama came to an SMF ring and announced he is making his way to become the President of the United States...and is the new SMF Owner! After taking official control from Jim Ross (Since, Triple H was never officially the owner) Obama said he is going to "change SMF, fix the problems, give more free tickets to middle class fans, and donate more chicken to the cooks in the back, Barack loves his fried chicken." Okay, that was a black joke. Not very funny. Sue us. But, What will happen as The Barack cleans house as new SMF Owner? Will he whoop that ass that is known as the WWE and will he try to defeat that jabroni, T-1000? Also, We have a new Action Star and TV champion in Chuck Norris and Stone Cold Steve Austin. What will happen with the SMF title situation, as The Barack has forced T-1000 to defend the belt in a fatal four way match? Here are the matches confirmed so far for SmackaDown!: SMF Tag Team Titles: Mr. Wollenburg vs. Flamin Kyle Fatal Four Way: SMF Championship: Friday, July 25, 2008 Oh sh*t! We have a new SMF Champion!! BOOM IS THE NEW CHAMPION!!! Boom, the alien who won the CAW Search last year, has risen up the ranks to capture the SMF Championship. And he won it with much controversy, as the UWO Champion, The Rob interfered and made the ref count the 3 count for Boom. Boom and Rob then claimed that they were sick of being treated like underdogs and showed us that even people like them could win main event titles. What will happen with this situation, and what will Jim Ross say about it? Also, Will Jim Ross stop the Jello Nation? And who is behind Kill.Us.Hi.Fi. It was mentioned that someone will die on SmackaDown....is this rumor true? Will we find out who is behind it? The 3 Minute CRU have KILLED Carlton and Will. Sources say that their bodies were not found, what does this mean? They are presumed dead, but are they? Also, The Green Ranger has challenged Captain Picard to a match for the SMF Action Star title...what will this mean? And also, what is the status of this Dragonzord thing? And that flute. Will the Green Ranger finally realize what he's doing is wrong? SmackaDown! Will get a bit more extreme! We are having our first Xtreme episode of the season. So far, a Caged TLC match has been rumored, and there is a confirmed TLC match for the SMF Tag Team Titles, Mysteries Inc. vs the feuding Al-Qaeda. Check the SMF Forums for more updates... And the Final King of the bitches match will take place on Smackadown. Which final two will make it to SmackaDown? The winner will not only become King of the Bitches, but also have a shot at the SMF Championship at the Royal Fumble. Don't forget about the CAW Search, another voting session is coming up soon. Stay Tuned to everything. Thursday, May 22, 2008 It has been crazy happenings in the SMF recently as we are set to come to our next event in our SMF saga called Cybersexy Summer. What this is, fans can vote in the SMF forums and vote for which match and what game the match will take place on as all of the SMF Championship titles are on the line. Also, our CAW Search is going on until June 1st. On the next WAR, we will announce the final four. Then it is up to the fans to vote off each CAW until the final two battle it out at the Royal Fumble. Finally, our SMF Championship situation is starting to get outta hand. Evil Ronald is our champ, and we also have three people who want the SMF title (well, Austinberg makes it four but, meh). We also have our King of the Bitches Tournament going on. The King of the Bitches winner will go on to face the SMF Champion at the Royal Fumble. We would also like to thank Allan from ACWL for commentating the Xtra matches. So stay tuned because wild things are happening in SMF. And it's only gonna get hotter as summer approaches, leading to one of the most epic finales in SMF history leading to Bitchamania. Wednesday, April 16, 2008 The Great American Clash was one of the craziest CPV's ever in SMF history. In the opener of the show, the TV Title battle royal came under way as Mr. Feeny won his first SMF TV Title by surprising everyone in coming out! An undefeated Britney Spears defended her SMF Big Ass & Tits Championship as she got her pregnant sister, Jamie Lynn to switcharoo with her as the lights went out. The Tag Team Turmoil match featured some unexpected teams, we never expected El Chacal and Don Francisco to come out, as well as the unusual team of BK Jordan and John Cena, as well as Chig Gambino and Wollenburg. But it ended up being a debut of Shaggy and Freddy from Scooby Doo taking on Zack and Slater from SBTB, in which Zack and Slater won the gold! Captain Picard and MacGyver had an epic ladder match for the Action Star Title. Captain Picard shocked the world when he did a Warp Speed 5 off the top of the ladder outside the ring. Holy Sh!!!! We have a new commissioner in Bill Cosby as that fool Sephiroth interfered yet again for no apparant reason, and then Boom had ruined Chuck Norris' chances of winning by interupting with a Boomerang, causing Norris the match and his chances of becoming Commissioner. What will happen between Norris and Boom, as Cosby is the new commish? Lashwell got married, but KILL.US.HI.FI had somehow killed him. Who is behind this, dammit?! And where is the hardcore title after Captain Kathryn Janeway had won the title, becoming the first woman to win the Hardcore title. Now that two Star Trek captains have SMF gold, will Janeway and Picard go after the Tag Team Championship as well? And finally, the Rock and Austinberg, in one of the most epic matches, Austinberg had finally captured SMF gold. Austin with his 3rd SMF Title and Goldberg with his first, but Lex Luthor gave Austinberg a drink with a potion that had made Austinberg weaker, and eventually split up Austinberg into Goldberg and Austin. Ronald McDonald, debuting his new evil looks, had finally used this opportunity to cash in his MITB, pinning both Austin and Goldberg to become the SMF Champion. What will happen as Ronald McDonald is now our SMF Champion!? And what's with Ronald's evil new look? On WAR, we will start with our SMF King Of the Bitches, similar to the King of the Ring. Whoever is crowned King of the Bitches, they will have a shot for the SMF Championship at the Royal Fumble 2008. Also, big news regarding the CAW Search will be coming very soon! Stay tuned! Tuesday, March 18, 2008 On WAR, we got a new number one contender for the SMF Championship, Stone Gold Still Austinberg. He will be facing The Rock at the Great American Clash. But, Chuck Norris announced that it will be Bin Laden vs. The Rock for the SMF Championship on SmackaDown! Who will go into the Clash as the champion? And who will Austinberg be facing? Also, Austinberg will be facing Ronald McDonald in a matchup on SmackaDown! after Ronald attacked the Rock, Norris thought Ronald would be perfect to get punished by Austinberg. Also, Lashwell are getting married at the Clash. What will they do to prepare for this wedding event? As well as Bill Cosby and the Chuck Norris situation? What about the TV Championship? Confirmed matches for Smackadown: And don't forget to check out the latest Speed, where Wollenbump takes on Jared. Wednesday, February 27, 2008 It was a crazy SmackaDown! We saw Ultimate Bin Laden ringside as we had a 6 man Over-The-Top battle royal. The winner of that match would face Bin Laden on WAR to determine the number 1 contender for Rock's title. Austinberg whipped ass in the match, and Bin Laden and Austinberg had a showdown. Everyone thought Austinberg would get pwnt by Bin Laden, but the opposite happened. With Austinberg being two men, Stone Cold Steve Austin and Goldberg combined into one superbeing, what is gonna happen after he faces the man with Clark Kent and Captain Planet's powers, Ultimate Bin Laden? Also, Commissioner Norris has signed a title match, The Rock will defend his SMF Championship against John Cena. Cena overcame the odds at a meeting, and convinced Norris to give him a shot. This will be a rematch of the Great American Clash 2007. Terrell Owens has been getting owned as of late by Kramer, will TO be in the house again? And what's up with Kramer challenging Saget for his SMF TV Championship? Kerio Law is still trying to decide who his partner will be. Boom hinted at himself, then Wollenburg got shutdown, who will Kerio choose for his partner? And also, Lashley PROPOSED to Christopher Lowell, and Lowell ACCEPTED! Lowell and Lashley will have a gay marriage at the next CPV in Boston, MA. Will anything happen in between now and the big wedding? And finally, we will see Captain Picard, MacGyver, and the Divas will be in the house. Lucy and Britney Spears. Confirmed matches as of now for WAR: As always, expect more matches to be announced beforehand. Wednesday, February 20, 2008 We have ushered in the new season of SMF with WAR as it turned out to be one of the biggest season premieres in SMF history. (Then again, the other seasons were only viewed by 3 or 4 people anyways) We have our SMF Champion, The Roc…err Dwayne, who has a huge target on his chest as Ultimate Bin Laden is on his tail. But, with the addition of the 2007 Money in the Bank winner Ronald McDonald, what will happen with our champ? We also saw the debuts of Bill Cosby and Captain Jean-Luc Picard of the U.S.S. Enterprise. As well as the whiner, Terrell Owens. We also saw the debut of Mr. Wollenburg as a…bumpmeister back from a serious head injury from Bitchamania. We also know that Teryo Law is dead somehow and Kerio must choose a partner or Chuck Norris will probably strip him of the SMF Tag Team Titles. Confirmed Matches: Terrell Owens vs. KKKramer: Terrell Owens was attacked on WAR by Kramer. Commissioner Norris made a match for SmackaDown! Ronald McDonald vs. The Burger King: Burger King jumped Ronald from behind on WAR, what will happen as these two iconic fast-food icons go at it one more time? Captain Picard vs. B.K. Jordan: Picard transported to the ring on WAR and transported Lowell out of the ring during his match. Picard beamed Lowell back to Earth after his match, but now Picard will face the man who has the wrestling ability of a greek god, B.K. Jordan. Will B.K. Jordan blind us all with his godlike wrestling ability? Kerio will also tell us the status of a tag-team partner. The Rock, Cena, Deacon Baptista, and Bush will also all be in the house. Don’t miss SmackaDown!, coming this Sunday to YouTube! Check out the SMF Forums for updates in case anything happens. Tuesday, September 11, 2007 SmackaDown! Episode 16 kicked off from Dallas, Texas. In the event we saw new tag team champions in Right To Censor, a new Hardcore Champion in Boom with a huge Boomerang off the SD Fist to Randy Orton, and a surprise Money In the Bank match with a winner in Ronald McDonald. We also found Daniel arrested on "To Catch a Predator", Austinberg causing chaos, what Bob Ross sounds like when he's sleep in a Boretista match, and Cena losing as usual on "The Price is Right". Ronald McDonald also received help in the Hell in a Cell match at Bitchamania in Papa John and Dave Thomas. The Rock wrapped up the show with a Rock Concert, dissing Dallas and Bush before his big match at Bitchamania. Bitchamania is coming soon, bear with me as the creators have school to deal with, so we have no idea when it will be coming. All we know is, it will be soon. A new SMF Speed episode is coming this Sunday with Britney Spears vs. Candace Cameron. We did not see Britney on SmackaDown because Britney was failing onstage at the 2007 VMA's. What will she be like when she wrestles a match on Speed? BitchaMania....is coming.... When? We...don't really know. But soon! Wednesday, August 22, 2007 Summertime cools down for the SMF as BitchaMania approaches. What better way to celebrate than with the biggest, most xtreme episode of SmackaDown yet? We will bring the tables, the ladders, the chairs, the cages, the blood, the most intense spots. And we are getting it not on a CPV, but on SmackaDown! We already have a huge SMF Tag Team Title match signed up. Chuck Norris will actually defend his SMF Texas Ranger Title against Bruce Lee in a Cage Match. And blood will be shed. Ronald McDonald will face Colonel Sanders in a First Blood Match. And also, we will have a Bra and Panties match. WWF's Trish Stratus and Torrie Wilson will be shedding their clothes. Show me your titties!! And also, Chuck Norris has a HUGE main event planned. But you will have to find out when the show airs. (Note: I am back in college full-time now, so this may be a week or two before this episode airs.) And don't forget, The Rock is having The Rock Concert to celebrate his planned victory over Bush at Mania for the SMF Championship. Don't miss SMF SmackaDown! Xtreme Episode 16. Coming in about a week or so!
Monday, August 13, 2007 SMF's Bangin' Hot Summer continues as SEME kicked off from Lowell, MA. Chocolate Rain by Tay Zonday was used as the theme song. We don't know why. JJ commentated the event while Bob Ross is on vacation. The Rock and Osama attacked the city of Lowell by trying to use the HBO satellite. But Bush stopped it. Rock made an offer to Bush, get a partner to fight against AlQaeda. If Bush's team won, Bush would get his mommy back. Bush picked Ronald McDonald, but Ronald was later jumped backstage again by the FFO. George Jefferson defended his TV title by DQ as Kramer screwed up the match. Kramer tried to get Mr. Feeny to join his White Power group, but Feeny rejected. Racism is bad. Cena tried to join Right To Censor and failed yet again as he always does. Lashwell defeated RTC, but Austin and Austin beat up Lashwell after the match. Britney Spears made an appearance tonight, but Candace Cameron had a few words with Britney. Britney banned the Lawyu Boyz from being in the arena after Teryo Law raped Britney on SD Episode 6. And finally, Randy Orton won the Hardcore title from Boom with a \_0__/. It seems that Boom held out for a few seconds before passing out. WAR is being worked on as you read this, it will be out by the end of the week (Thursday hopefully) Look out for it. Friday, August 3, 2007 Rock, Osama Bin Laden and Bush were talking and we find out that Barbara Bush has been captured. The only way Bush can get his mommy back is if he gives up the government. Steve Urkel saw DJ Tanner and started talking to her, the Bob Saget got racist and said go pick some cotten. Later in the night, Urkel confronted DJ again and Saget and Kramer made Urkel go away, is Kramer trying to get Saget to go racist with him? Urkel, Saget, Kramer, and Jefferson had a fatal four way for the SMF TV Title. Nick Patrick the referree got racist at the beginning, Kramer did a bronco buster and was being racist to Steve Urkel and George Jefferson. But George Jefferson got the title with the Weezy. Gold.... Stone Hot meets Ken Kennedy backstage, the Kennedy thinks its Stone Cold... SO Stone Hot attacks him! During Lashwell vs. Austin and...Austin, Nick Patrick keeps thinking Stone Cold is Goldberg and wants him to get outta the ring. Gay Lovers def. Austin Bros. by DQ b/c Nick Patrick thought Goldberg was Austin and Austin wouldnt get out the ring. Then Kerio Law vs Greg Boom comes in the ring before the match Teryo is mentoring Boom now..... Then the ugly MySpace girl with that nasty voice, next week she is making her debut! Kerio and Greg had an impressive match, what will happen with the Lawyuz and the Super Dingos? We found out that Bruce Lee has been paying MacGyver to blow up Chuck Norris' vehicles. But since Chuck Norris is Chuck Norris, fire doesn't hurt our beloved Commissioner. Why did Bruce attack Chuck Norris, and why is MacGyver helping him? And finally, Bush tried to make a trap. He let AlQaeda control the government, but he made Clark Kent beat up Osama and Rock so he could get his mother and have control of the country back. ....Yeah.....that didn't go to well, as Bin Laden was randomly wearing a kryptonite turbin to stun Clark Kent as The Rock got the Rock Bottom on Bush. Bush now lost his country and his mother to AlQaeda. What will happen on WAR? And on WAR, we may learn of the matches that will take place at Bitchamania! And also, a rumor going around is that Mr. Kennedy will make his SMF debut against Ronald McDonald. Catch Speed this Sunday too, as Boom has an open challenge for his hardcore title. Monday, July 23, 2007 Lance Bass was scheduled to take a part of an open challenge yesterday on Speed. So, who else than Christopher Lowell and his man Lashley to put him in a handicap match. Lance took a beating and pounding from Lashwell, as Lance got pinned. After the match, Lance was seen talking to SMF officials, about the negative press that match gaveout. After all, Lance is just a media attention whore. Lance was furious about getting caught lying about being straight at the Fumble, being in the Fumble match for a while and getting kicked out, and getting owned on Speed. So, SMF has decided to officially release Lance Bass. We wish him well in all of his future endeouvors. Lance has gone back into the acting scene, his first job after leaving the SMF was on the new movie "I Now Pronounce You Larry and Chuck". He dyed his hair dark brown (to get away from his SMF career) and sung a gay song at a gay wedding in the movie. FABULOUS! Expect SmackaDown! this or next week Tuesday, July 17, 2007 WAR kicked off with The Rock stating how and why he took out Bush. This was an ingenious plan by Bin Laden to take out Bush and to help elevate his "apprentice" in The Rock. (Kinda like a bad Star Wars storyline...except Arab) Kramer won his SMF TV Title match against Steve Urkel after Carl Winslow interfered and screwed Steve out of the title. Then George Jefferson came to the ring and made Carl choose between helping Steve, or abandoning him. Who will Carl Winslow choose? Daniel took out Joey and captured his dingo outfit. Daniel is posing as an imposter Joey, and Greg doesn't realize it yet. When will Greg realize that Joey is not...Joey? And what did Daniel do with Joey? At least they retained their tag team titles again. They need to lose them, they have a 7 month winning streak. It appears the dingos have taken some of Cena's overcoming the odds power? Hmmm... Chuck Norris was going to sign autographs but someone bombed his limo. It was MacGyver! Why did MacGyver do this? And we need to find out WHO paid MacGyver to take out Commissioner Norris. Will we find out who paid MacGyver on SmackaDown? Randy Orton briefly won the Hardcore Champion, making him a 2 time SMF Hardcore Champion. Boom retained his hardcore championship with help from Teryo Law, making Boom a 3 time Hardcore Champion. Will we find out why Teryo Law helped out Boom? And why Cena can't do the Orton pose? And finally, in the main event, The Rock faced Ronald McDonald for the SMF Championship. After the Rock acted cocky as ever, The Rock underestimated Ronald and Ronald won the SMF Championship! But Bin Laden pointed out that Rock's foot were under the ropes and the Rock retained. After the match, Bush presidential slammed The Rock! What will happen in the biggest feud in CAW history?! And who the hell is Goldberg? Whoopi? Austin's long lost twin brother? What is this...WCW he spoke of? Monday, July 2, 2007 The Royal Fumble is here! As we have a new SMF Superstar in Boom, and a new hardcore champion in Boom which changed hands many times during the night. Boom capitalized when he met Hardcore Holly in a subway station, hit the Boom on him, and left the area in a subway. Greg picked Joey after showing an ugly fat chick from MySpace. A new racist TV champion was crowned in Kramer as Steve Urkel screwed up Carl Winslow. And we crowned a new SMF Champion in the Rock, in Rock-Austin IV; one of the best matches we have seen in CAW history. Not to mention, a Royal Fumble winner that shocked many fans last night. Chuck Norris defended his SMF Texas Ranger Championship by pwning Steven Seagal in the Cage TLC match. Chuck defied gravity when he jumped off the top fo the cage 20 feet below to put Seagal through a table below. Seagal was broken in half. After the matchup, an insanely injured Seagal was furious that he lost and started choking out the SMF staff backstage. So, SMF has released this press statement: "We have come to terms with the release of Steven Seagal. We wish him well in all of his future projects and failing direct-to-DVD movies." Looks like noone can stop Chuck Norris. The biggest shocker of the night was the People's Champion, The Rock joined Al-Qaeda, converted to Muslim, and is now under the guardian of Osama Bin Laden. The Rock confessed to being the attacker of George W. Bush. The Rock and Bush are going to be in Bitchamania's main event for the SMF Championship. What will happen in one of the industry's most talked about matches in 2007? Catch the Royal Fumble in it's entirety on YouTube and don't forget to check out the SMF Forums for all the latest news and updates. Wednesday, June 27, 2007 On Speed, Steven Seagal choked out Mr. Wollenburg of Right To Censor. Will Seagal do the same to Chuck Norris this Sunday at the Royal Fumble in the Cage TLC match? Mr. Wollenburg, a former SMF Champion, had Seagal with the Censoring Elbow, but the ref was knocked out and JJ had another random brainfreeze. We at the SMF must help out JJ with that. But anyways, Seagal dramatically choked out Wollenburg, just like in his movies. The Royal Fumble should be up in it's entirety on Sunday. Just note that the Fumble may be around 12 parts long. So, if you have nothing to do for about an hour and 45 minutes, the Fumble should entertain you. And yes, Chris Benoit is a part of the Royal Fumble, as we had no way of knowing he would be a killer and suicidal. However, we recorded the footage about 2 weeks prior to his death, so don't get mad at us. We were going to dedicate the show to Benoit, but as of now, there's no point. Don't forget to check out Bob Ross' new blog on MySpace. Thursday, June 21, 2007 After a hellacious SmackaDown!, Teryo Law faced Bin Laden and lost the number 30 spot at the Royal Fumble. Teryo and his partner Kerio have created much controversy in the past few weeks by jumping The Rock and Stone Cold Steve Austin from behind, are they the ones responsible for the Bush attacks? Also, The Royal Fumble is just a week away. Who will walk away with the new SMF contract, Jaxx or Boom? What will Chuck Norris have in store for Steven Seagal in the Cage TLC match for the Texas Ranger championship? And what will Lance Bass do about Lashley stealing Christopher Lowell from him? And finally, the biggest rematch in sports-entertainment is about to go down. Rock/Austin Four for the SMF Championship is gonna be intense. Look out for Royal Fumble 2007 soon. Commentated by Bob Ross (and maybe JJ at the same time if we can somehow get the equipment to work but the equipment people have been out drinking all night and they got too fucked up to fix the problem and one of them banged a hooker and.....err yeah, anyways) Bookmark this site as well as the great fansite for updates on the CPV! Also, don't forget to check out Bob Ross' blog on our MySpace site! |
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